Absent Mindedly

I wasn't thinking about creating a post. But I clicked the button for it.
So I'm writing now.

Life now seems to be double-sided. In my case, that is.

I am happy. I can giggle, laugh out loud, and I'm glad about it.
I can get along with most people I am with everyday. That old so-much-lack-of-ease when being with my classmates has seemed to fade. I feel closer to them than ever. I feel comfortable.
Indeed, I am happy. I can be jumpy and smiley.

Although times of being "serious" has never been gone, and perhaps never will be. It is a part of me. It is part of my adjective. But it's such a cliche that people has attached me with, and I want to get rid of. I am not serious. I am realistic.

And then the other side...

When the noises are distant, when no one can hear me, when I am perfectly still inside, I reflect on life. I look at my situation, and try to understand. I am not unfortunate, I am completely fine. But like most people, if not everyone else, I have my own share of distress, those things enough to wake you up in the middle of the night crying. Those things that touch your heart in a rather desirable way, but with undesirable side effects.
I will not go on with the details. Life is tough, and most people -- again if not all -- will understand, I am sure.

These are my reflections, and hopefully they will resound.